Recently we aired a podcast episode about a day in the life of a daycare, and in that conversation, we mentioned just briefly other childcare options like a nanny and babysitter. We thought we’d do a deeper dive into those options, since a lot of parents might use one or both.
This will be a “very merry” episode because our guests today are both named Mary. Merri Aydelott spent years as a nanny before she became a mom herself and Mary Hill currently acts as a nanny for a family. We’ll have to call them Merri A and Mary H so you’ll know who we’re talking to!
Introduce.
What is a nanny? Employed on a part- or full-time basis, nannies are child care professionals—usually with educational backgrounds and/or training. Nannies meet many of a child’s needs, caring for children physically, socially, and emotionally. Some nannies help with homework while others complete cleaning-related tasks, like laundry or tidying a child’s room, and nannies can live in or out of the home. Their focus is more babies and young children–before school age.
That’s different from a sitter, who generally is only used on an as-needed basis.
It’s also different from an au pair, just to be clear. An au pair is a young adult from overseas who lives with you as a family member and provides culturally enriching childcare. If you’d fancy your child learning a second language, this is a good option.
And a nanny is ALSO different from a governess, which is someone who lives in with the family as a private tutor for school-aged children and does less hands-on day to day care.
(When I think of a nanny, roles like Mrs Doubtfire, Mary Poppins, or the nursemaid in PeterPan come to mind. A lot of my vision of nannies is fairly British-based, turns out! I kind of expect them to have an accent. )
Can you tell us how you came to be a nanny?
Did you have any particular training for it (child & family studies, etc.)?
Have you found that training requirements have changed over the years? (nannies may be more likely now to have had child CPR certification, childhood education, etc.)
Merri A–what did a typical “day in the life” look like for you?
Mary H?
If kids had appointments (doctor, therapy, mommy & me classes, etc.), was that something you’d do?
Open ability to drive places? Do you keep carseats in your cars?
What was (is) your favorite thing about being a nanny?
Did you (do you) relate to the kids in your care differently than their parents? Time spent with them may actually be more than their parents from week to week.
Did you talk about styles/approaches/discipline?
Did (do) the families you work for have nanny cams? What would you say about that?
In our daycare episode, we talked about some of the pros to having a nanny. They provide consistent child care and work set hours, usually in your home. Nannies give your child one-on-one attention and attend to all of their physical, social, and emotional needs, and they’re generally more flexible than a daycare. They also expose your children to fewer germs, which is a concern for some parents. That said, there are cons to nannies, including:
- Cost. Nannies tend to be more expensive than daycare centers and babysitters. Average monthly pay for a nanny in US is $4085/month (as of Feb 2024, ZipRecruiter). Some as high as $6333 and as low as $2000…
- Lack of privacy. Some people do not like the idea of having an outside person in their home for so many hours most days of the week.
- No backup option. While daycare centers are open whether or not your child’s teacher falls ill, the same is not true with nannies. If your nanny is sick—or on vacation—there is no backup option. What do you both do if you have to unexpectedly be absent??
How to Find a Nanny
You can use an agency or word of mouth.
Do interviews at your home, with your child(ren) present to see how they interact.
Either way, it’s good to be aware of what may go along with hiring a nanny:
Wage Agreements
Rights & Responsibilities as an “employer”. You’re considered a domestic employer if there is a paid worker in your home, working full or part time (even once a week or once a month) cleaning, cooking, assisting, or caring for members of the household.
If you’re a domestic employer, some things you may need to consider are: ensuring a fair & safe workplace, laws surrounding employment. It differs from state to state, but you may need an employer ID number so you can pay taxes, possible worker’s comp insurance (for liability). You’ll have to comply with minimum wage and overtime pay requirements (no OT for live ins; otherwise, it’s 1.5x if it’s over 40 hrs/wk).
For many long-term employees like nannies, families want to retain that person for continuity & reliability with their kids. You may consider: mileage compensation, health benefits, paid time off. You may have to be aware of time needed for termination notices. There’s a lot more that goes into hiring a nanny than just finding the perfect match for your kids.