Today’s episode is another feature on preparedness. We talk intentionality and preparedness a lot when it comes to kids (most notably in our recent episodes on The Book of Important Things & on water safety & kids). Today we’re talking about the realm of safety & security in general.
& we have as our guest, David Sproles, who is a certified firearms instructor who has participated in multiple training programs on emergency preparedness and self defense. (and also happens to be Renee’s husband and an Eagle scout, lifeguard, and the guy you want to have on a camping trip).
This is NOT meant to be a scary, pile-on-the-worry/anxiety sort of conversation. But it’s a good idea to know a few things, not be naïve, and to teach your kids some basics for their own safety.
I think let’s start with worldview. On the one hand, we want to teach our children common sense, situational awareness, & caution. It’s our job to keep them safe as best we can, knowing they can’t and shouldn’t live in a bubble. (There’s a great book out now called Bomb Shelter, by Nashville author Mary Laura Philpott…it’s a memoir & about this very thing—wanting to shield everyone we love from every bad thing and how we go on living/facing life anyway.)
But on the other hand, we certainly don’t want them to approach life in an anxious/fearful way. We still want to find the good in others, know that people can be helpful and kind, and to know that above all, our ultimate security rests in our Heavenly Father.
We did an episode fairly recently on parenting a fearful child, and certain kids (and adults) due to temperament or experience, can be prone to fearfulness. One way to alleviate that is to help them feel confident and prepared.
SITUATIONAL AWARENESS. Talk about this. What is it? (like an umbrella for all the other aspects of safety). At restaurants, theaters, ATMs, parking lots/garages…
YOU CAN’T BE AWARE IF YOU’RE ON YOUR PHONE. PERIOD.
Have a meeting place in mind in case you’re separated. Make sure everyone know where it is and how to get there..
FIRE SAFETY
All schools are required to have fire drills. We had the requisite fire safety programs where we learned to not play with matches, and the stop-drop-& roll drill which tbh, from the school programs, I really thought I would have used that a lot more in real life than I have. (thankful that hasn’t happened.) Numbers of non-traditional students are climbing (homeschool, etc.), so those old-school fire drills aren’t a given for every kid anymore.
What can we as parents/families do at home when it comes to fire safety/preparedness?? What would that look like depending on the age of the child? Have a plan & practice it (for kids 5 and up); assign a person to look out for pets. if you can wrangle them, great. If not, get out first! Know where to meet— (e.g., in backyard, in front yard by big tree, etc.). Teach them basic fire safety like touching doorknobs to see if they’re hot, watching for smoke underneath doors before opening, staying low, etc.
Here’s another one: STRANGER DANGER. We want our kids to engage other people, be friendly, and at the same time we have this “strangers are bad” warning. How do we talk to our kids about strangers?
–role playing, difference in being with mom/dad vs. being alone, who can pick you up at school/activities/friend’s house etc.
Age by age: 5 yr old vs. 15 yr old. (older kids: internet dangers/chat rooms in video games, etc., out at parties…)
Depending on where you live in the country, you might face WEATHER RELATED emergencies. Here in TN we have tornados. Up north there can be heavy snow/ice. Out west there’s wildfires or earthquakes, and on the east coast they have hurricane season. In our area, the weather folks on the news are all about being alert during storms with apps and weather radios. What do we do (teach our kids to do) about storms/events like these?
What can we do to minimize fearfulness/anxiety in kids who might be afraid when the weather alerts come on TV? Or when a big thunderstorm comes thru? Have a plan, with a safe place, and practice going there. That alone gives kids security. You can have a wind-up radio for weather in case power goes out or batteries are dead. It’s a good idea to keep a few items in your safe place in case you have to stay there for a while: portable kid potty; water; snacks; flashlight; shoes; chargers; whistle; protection (blankets/pillows); place for pets to stay–crate/carrier.
Tell me about CAR SAFETY.
First, what do you need to have IN your car (just in case of x,y,z) besides ALL the snacks? (refer below to all-purpose just-in-case bag); also a glass-break hammer & one that cuts a seatbelt in case of entrapment
For parents of older kids—those getting behind the wheel—what do we need to be telling our kids who are drivers besides wear your seatbelt and keep your hands off your phone?
Be a member of AAA and register all your kids as members. They need to pull far off the road and get far away from vehicle as they wait for assistance. (or, try to pull into a public gas station, parking lot, etc. rather than side of road). Call AAA so THEY can safely help you.
(when/where do you pull over? What do you do if car breaks down? Keep gas tank ¼ full!!! Etc…)
***Another aspect: put an important object in the back seat so you have to get it (and not leave a child in a hot car). Also, if your child is missing, the first 2 places you should look immediately are: water & car. Keep car locked & keys are NOT to be touched…little kids can get in but not out.
If you’re a parent long enough, odds are your kid’s going to get hurt. We had several broken bones with just our 2 and I can’t even tell you how many trips to the ER there were with me and my 4 siblings when I was a kid. As a parent, what should we know about FIRST AID?
What can KIDS do? How old do they have to be to have first aid knowledge? How can you teach them along the way?
Where can you go to learn CPR, first aid? (It’s different for infants than older kids!) Red Cross, sometimes in pre-natal classes.
CHOKING: the LifeVac device!!
SELF-DEFENSE: free class at many local police departments. Given the statistics on college campuses and with women in general (#metoo), I’m surprised more families don’t even consider this. (pepper spray key chain & call it a day). Consider karate (which is more than self defense). It’s nothing like the Cobra Kai series karate kid spin off!
I guess it needs to be talked about, but I HATE that it does. Before we do, we might want to advise listeners with littles in the vicinity to not have this on speaker or playing in the car….(pause). I have hope that we can work to change things in our country to address the mental illness, warning signs of those who would commit random acts of violence.
Active Shooter Situations. Your kids were homeschooled, so they didn’t have to experience the regular drills for this sort of thing during their school day. But it’s not just schools—any realm of public life anymore can be fair game for the worst situation.
Terror at Beslan book — book written by US military officer called to scene of Russian school shooting tragedy.
What do we need to know? Are there actually things we can do/teach our kids to do to mitigate risk and/or tragedy?
Back in the 60s, kids were hiding under their desks at school for nuclear drills during the Cold War. If you watch enough movies (or know enough people high up in the military!), you’re probably familiar with an EMP (electro magnetic pulse). First of all, is this the newest dystopian movie plot or what? In the event of an EMP, what can we really do?
David talked about having a bag in the car & home with essentials in it. A well-stocked bag–one that would offer you protection for a few days–might run about $1000 if it’s packed with all the items he has in his own. There are less expensive options or items you might choose to omit, but this gives a good all-inclusive idea of what to include:
72 Hour Truck Packing List
LBX Tactical 72 hour bag $100
Outdoor Research Stuff Sack $15
Columbia Insulated puffy jacket $100
Ear warmers $15
Insulated gloves $25
Stuff sack with rain jacket $100
LifeHammer $13
Atwood Rope Micro cord dispenser $15
Atwood Parapocalyspe Survival Cord (25 feet) $10
Atwood Paracord Dispenser (50 feet) $20
Bank Line (50 feet) $12
55 gallon contractor grade garbage bag $1
Small roll of duct tape $9
Small roll of Gorilla tape $3
OLight Seeker 2 Pro light (with charging cable) $140
Zip bag with fire starting contents
Esbit fuel tabs $15
Ferro rod $7
Home made paper/paraffin fire starter $2
Lighter $1
Leatherman Juice S2 multi tool $65
Esee 4 Survival knife $120
Signal mirror and signal whistle $13
SOL Emergency blankets (x2) $20
Package of “grocery” sacks
LifeStraw water bottle/filter with 4 packs of DripDrop (Bragg25 for 25% off) $43, $5
JetBoil Flash cooking system $110
Mountain House PRO Breakfast Skillet freeze dried packs (x2) $20
IFAK (Individual First Aid Kit) $75
Survival Tabs food rations $20
CPR mask $9
N95 Masks $20
6 bottles of water $2
Thick work gloves $23
Ben’s 30% DEET Tick & Insect Repellent $24
Extra cash and credit card ($1,000)
“Fear not” is mentioned in some form or other 365x in scripture. God clearly doesn’t want His people to go through life afraid. The fact that we often tend to be anyway is maybe one reason He has to mention it over and over. (Does that sound like a parent? How many times do I have to tell you…???!)
We aren’t biologically wired to be on high-alert at all times. We see the fall-out from that when we look at trauma survivors or the effects of PTSD–where a person’s neurology in steady fight/flight mode makes their body/mind ill. We can’t react rationally/reasonably to normal day-to-day emotions/situations when our mind/body is telling us we should be in panic mode.
Kids look to their parents for cues about whether they should be afraid or not. (Savannah’s head injury one night.) Anxiety/fear is contagious….it’s why the lemmings all run off the cliff in one big pell mell group.
So remember we’re not trying to communicate that uncertainty, insecurity, anxiety to our kids. In fact, we want to do just the opposite AND be prepared/aware.
On the one hand, kids are concrete. On the other, they have vivid imaginations. If you’re going to communicate about safety, be concrete (not just a generalized “be careful”). Be age appropriate depending on the subject so you don’t unnecessarily feed their imaginations—just what they need to know, not an entire course on all the possible bad outcomes.