This week’s episode might step on some toes?? (maybe, maybe not). We have back with us two of our favorite guests (from the popular #GirlMom episode—which is still in our Top 10 downloaded list)…and we’re digging into KIDS & SPORTS.
So, welcome back to Lori Shea (pause) and Amy Sain (pause).
We’ve asked them to weigh in on this topic because Lori’s husband, Drew, is what you might call a bit of a sports guy (explain). And at least one of their 3 daughters played soccer seriously all the way through college, so Lori is (among other things) one of those real life “soccer moms”.
And AMY—is here because of what I’d call her bird’s-eye view of lots and lots of young families (nursery through 6th grade) in her role as a children’s minister. Her own girls tried sports, too but maybe not at the same level as Lori’s.
Full disclosure for Renee & me: my daughter did dance/gymnastics for about 5 minutes, T-ball around first grade, rode horses for a few years, and cheerleading for about 4 years, and my son did a local recreational soccer league for a time, and then stayed in karate, trap, and rock climbing.
Renee: Emma in dance, horses; Houston—baseball for a time when he was younger and then spikeball.
From a 2019 nat’l survey on kids’ sports, we learned the following:
- The average child today spends less than 3 yrs playing a sport, quitting by age 11
- Parents hope having their kids in sports will promote physical and emotional health, as well as sport skills, social skills and peer relationships, with each of those reasons rating above 4 on a scale of 1 to 5. But the most desired outcome, they say, is fun, which led the way at 4.49. At the same time, many parents are looking for extrinsic rewards as well – admissions advantages to colleges, athletic scholarships, and pro sports opportunities all scored above 3.
- the average age at which a child starts playing sports is still close to 8, despite some starting in preschool.
Let’s talk about those points. Even tho that average age is reported to be close to 8, I think we’ve all seen the age at which kids are enrolled in activities like sports get younger.
PRESCHOOL dance classes, PRESCHOOL and K-2nd grade SPORTS TEAMS….
Why do you think that is? It’s not because all of a sudden kids are developing differently and are now better focused, more competitive, or have better motor skills.
For each of us, was it our KIDS’ CHOICE to try the sport/activity or was it OUR INSISTENCE?
Does this make a difference? How will they know if they like it or have a talent at it if they don’t try it? Are they more or less apt to stick with it if it’s their desire or their parents’ idea?
POSITIVE EFFECT OF SPORTS on KIDS/FAMILIES
It’s long been said that sports (in particular team sports) have many great benefits besides physical fitness.
CHARACTER/SKILLS: Teamwork, commitment, goal setting, learning how to win/lose, practicing a skill, love of the game, learning how to be coached (coaches can be Parents 2.0 in many cases) etc.
Lori—what’s your take on this? What did you see with Madison here? What do you think Maddie would say?
$$ FOR COLLEGE: Skilled athletes should consider having a backup plan when it comes to paying for college. Only around 1.3% of high school athletes are awarded some sort of athletic scholarship. Compared to what percentage of students get scholarships in general, the number is very low.
We can assume that the number of athletes receiving a full ride is lower than 1%. If we look at academic scholarships vs. athletic scholarships statistics, college applicants have a higher chance of receiving aid based on academic merit.
Remember that the average kid spends less than 3 yrs playing a sport at all…so THE ODDS that an early money and time investment/sacrifice in a particular sport will get them picked up by NCAA are low.
PHYSICAL ACTIVITY
Adolescents who play sports are 8x more likely to be active by age 24. Three in four adults who play sports today played when they were school-aged. We all know the benefits of regular exercise…leisure time physical activity associated with reduced risk of 13 difft types of cancer.
Active kids do better in life: up to 40% higher test scores, fewer risky behaviors, 15% more likely to go to college, 7% higher annual earnings, better mental health
DOWNSIDES
INJURIES
From the Stanford Children’s Health website:
In the U.S., about 30 million children and teens participate in some form of organized sports, and more than 3.5 million injuries each year, which cause some loss of time of participation, are experienced by the participants. Almost one-third of all injuries incurred in childhood are sports-related injuries.
How does this square with our experiences/our kids?
HAZING
In a recent book on raising boys I read, there was a whole disturbing section on hazing in sports and the code of silence (therefore underreporting) that goes along with it. (Which means just b/c your kid hasn’t said anything about it, doesn’t mean he/she hasn’t experienced it OR participated in it.)….
In US high school student-athletes, estimates indicate that as many as 800,672 individuals are hazed per year, and that 25% reported the first incident before the age of 13 years. As many as 80% of NCAA athletes have experienced some level of hazing in college, with 42% experiencing similar events in high school.
With travel sports, the incidents are increasing…. b/c it’s hotel rooms instead of locker rooms. You can google the frequency of hazing and might be surprised.
https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2021/may/18/sports-team-hazings-fatalities-high-school-college
TIME SPENT ON SPORTS
(again from 2019 survey): The average child spent 11.9 hours per week on their sport, with the most popular sports – baseball (13.4), basketball (12.3) and soccer (10.8) – all around that mark. But some parents reported that their children play upwards of 60 hours a week during their sport season; that’s more than the average college athlete in any sport, according to NCAA research.
Amy— weigh in here. If you’re taking this much time with a child’s physical development, what other areas of development are getting less of an investment?
Travel teams are selective youth teams that play at an elite level in a variety of sports, including baseball, soccer, softball and lacrosse. Typically, they are run as part of a private or club sports program rather than a recreational league. Players travel long distances to participate in games, tournaments and showcase events.
(this is from a June 2022 article) The youth sports market in the U.S. topped $19 billion annually before the pandemic. A big part of that is the rise in travel sports operations and associated tournaments and showcase events over the last two decades.
“The travel sports, I think, have grown so much in popularity because those kids that are interested in playing for their high school team, interested in playing in college, they really have to work out through that system to train with kids of a similar level to reach those aspirations,” says Adam Payne, a parent who coaches a girls soccer travel team through Carolina Football Club Hendersonville.
Some of them are starting at age 6 and spending all summer going to tournaments. That’s hotels, travel, vacation days, multiple games in a row.
The Hendersonville-based girls soccer team Payne coaches has played roughly 130 games together over the last four years. A player competing only in a rec league, on the other hand, may have played something like 30 games in that stretch.
When it comes time for school tryouts, the difference readily becomes apparent.
One father/coach says many families choose to participate in travel sports out of a fear of missing out. “They’re told if they’re not specializing, they’re going to get left behind, they’re just not going to keep up with the other kids that are playing all the time,” he says.
****The kids have a similar pressure/FOMO.. (boys especially? Or moreso? It’s a way to belong.
Parents want their kids to be successful, to be really good at something. (WHAT IS THE MOTIVATION HERE? IS IT FOR THEM OR FOR US?)
(experience: Middle school….bouncing btwn cheer & karate some afternoons..)
MONEY/COST
***Children from low-income families are half as likely to play sports as kids from upper-income homes
(from 2019 nat’l survey): To keep them playing, many parents are willing to spend lots of money. Parents with a child in ice hockey spent on average $2,583 per year – the most expensive sport among the 21 sports evaluated. Other costly sports included skiing/snowboarding ($2,249), field hockey ($2,125), gymnastics ($1,580) and lacrosse ($1,289). The least-expensive sports: track and field ($191), flag football ($268), skateboarding ($380), cross country ($421), and basketball ($427). The average across sports was $693. But even the least-expensive sports had some parents spend in excess of $9,000 per year on one child. In six sports (baseball, gymnastics, ice hockey, skiing/snowboarding, swimming and tennis), some parents spent $12,000 or more in one year, with tennis at the highest end ($34,900).
SPORTS are as AMERICAN AS APPLE PIE
Why are sports so important in America?
Sports play an important role in American society. They enjoy tremendous popularity but more important they are vehicles for transmitting such values as justice, fair play, and teamwork. Sports have contributed to racial and social integration and over history have been a “social glue” bonding the country together.
FAMILY PRIORITIES & INTENT
How do you spend your time/money?
What are your family values?
What do you want MOST for your kids?
What are you willing to give up for your child to play sports?
Consider the whole family—when one child is playing at an elite level, what are siblings doing?