“Half of families face substance abuse or mental health issues, yet 90% of them don’t seek help.”
That alarming stat is from the STEPS Ministries website (https://lifeimprovementsteps.com/). We have the founder of STEPS Ministries, Steve Ward, here with us on today’s episode.
STEVE: Steve has 2 sons and worked for IBM for 38 yrs. They’re located in Birmingham, AL. He and his wife both drank heavily, and they ended up finding AA and CR (celebrate recovery). Their oldest son soon experienced his own struggles with substances.
We were drawn to your ministry because of its preventive focus. I think most parents would agree it would be far better to PREVENT addiction and associated issues than to have to treat a problem that’s spiraled into consequences, dangerous situations and difficult rehab.
What are you seeing in 2025 in your ministry? (family makeup, types of addictions, etc.). Is focus more on illegal (underage) substances or also porn, digital addiction, food, etc.?
You developed a framework that you’ve found is offering healing and hope. Tell us what PACES stands for and how it works.]
At STEPS ministries, they aim to give a realistic assurance of a positive future, and to let families know there are things that can be done when they face addiction. These are the same assurances our kids need when we’re confronted with their struggle.
Preparation, Aware, Connected, Educated, Steps
Parents often think “it can’t happen to us.” We need to be prepared and actively anticipating the realities of not only substances but other addictions (porn, gambling, digital addiction).
Parents/families are BUSY and it’s easy to drift and become disconnected. “We didn’t think the problem was that serious.” Until you can’t ignore it anymore.
Maintaining connection–especially when it’s hard or unrewarding–is critical. “I can’t talk to them anymore.”
There are resources available! People willing to help. Educate yourself about what’s out there and what’s needed. “We didn’t know what to do when they were struggling.”
Have a plan. “We should have done something sooner.”
We were raised in the 80’s…so the “Just Say No” era of Nancy Reagan. Bonnie’s kids were in public school in the 90’s and 00’s and they had SRO officers in, etc. By 1st or 2nd grade, they came home singing:
“I won’t do drugs, no never not me, cause I want my body being drug free…” They had an early aversion to smoking b/c we were so negative about it, I think. Alcohol? We didn’t have it in the house, we didn’t drink—but members of our family do. I know we had conversations about all these things—at different ages.
Renee: you didn’t have SRO officers in homeschool….unless you count David, which you probably could! What was your approach?
So a lot of parents—as with many things—they let school (or Sunday school) have the conversations and do the educating. Do you think parents can be doing more? How?
There’s a genetic component to addiction. It used to be families didn’t talk about the uncle who always showed up soused at the holidays, or the cousin who “struggled.” Leaving kids to make up their own stories or imagine something about them.
That’s a very common issue with children of alcoholics—we don’t talk about what’s going on with mom or dad. Even to each other. (Netflix series THE BEAR)
Do you think now—when mental illness is less stigmatized & our feelings are aired much more—that’s still the case? There are billboards about opioid addiction—it’s not something we shove into the closet anymore. That’s better, right?
We had Samantha Perkins on as a guest (Alive AF) & I see more people choosing to be healthier and happier by being alcohol-free.
Open communication? If you have addiction in the family, better to be aware of it and WARY of it in yourself instead of being blindsided. Maybe structure your family or your habits differently because you never know what’s going to trigger someone’s genetic blueprint?